thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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