She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
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