Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
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The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
When are your genitals available?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize