I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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