My brain says no but my pants say off.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize