Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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