This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize