I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize