Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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