we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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