Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize