Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize