Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
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