does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
The struggles of a small town man whore
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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