Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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