All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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