I puked a lego.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize