I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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