dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize