since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
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she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
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Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
His nipple licking is glorious
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