He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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