so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
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chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
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My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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