is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize