I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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