Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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