i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
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