ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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