is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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