so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize