I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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