Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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