Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
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do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
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That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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