So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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