Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
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Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
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