i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize