ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I think my moral compass just broke
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