bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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