I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize