Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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