do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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