don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
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Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
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I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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