I wish I could punch you in the face.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
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You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
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By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
that is very illegal...i love you.
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