how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always time for handjobs
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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