you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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