his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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