i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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