sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
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He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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