I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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