ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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