I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize